What I've Learned About Suicide as a Psychic Medium

When someone takes their own life, society asks questions.
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• Why didn’t they reach out to someone?
• How could they leave their family behind?
• They didn’t seem depressed…how could they do that?
• They had it all…why did they do that??​

Many folks even declare that to end a life is selfish.

As an intuitive medium who communicates with souls who have passed on — including souls who’ve committed suicide — I want to share what I’ve come to learn about suicide from a spiritual perspective.

My hope is that by sharing what I’ve experienced and learned over the years, you’ll find a bit of comfort in knowing your loved ones and friends who took their own lives are still loving you from the other side.

THERE IS NO HELL
I’ve learned that taking your own life isn’t a sin and there is no “hell” in a fire and brimstone way. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. When you pass on, you are greeted by loved ones and guides who help you adjust to being in spirit/soul form sans a human body. From what I’ve experienced, this is true for all of us, no matter how we pass.

Sometimes confusion and fear set in (on a soul level) after one takes their own life. Like in the case of Matt, a teen who committed suicide and came to me in spirit for help, he just needed to be reassured that he wasn’t going to hell if he crossed into the light. His religion told him he’d burn in hell. I told him what I knew about the light: that once he entered it, he could come back and forth on a spirit level. That he was not crossing over into a fiery eternity. Thank goodness he believed me and moved easily into the arms of his loved ones on the other side. (NOTE: I share more about my time with Matt, and how he found me, in my memoir, LITTLE VOICES (Post Hill Press/Simon and Schuster).

From what I’ve learned as a medium, Earth is quite literally “earth school” — a place we come to learn and grow, and most importantly, love. We’re here as souls in human form to learn to love ourselves and others. It sounds simple, right?! But look at the way we judge and treat others. We’re masters at raising people up and tearing them down. And then dictating how everyone should live. The business of being human is messy, wonderful, heartbreaking, complicated, and believe it or not, purposeful. We even sign up for more of it lifetime after lifetime. It’s hard to comprehend with our rational human minds, but on a soul level, it makes perfect sense. After all, we’re souls having a human experience, not the other way around.

LIFE EXIT POINTS
From my experience talking with loved ones on the other side, we pre-plan possible life exits before our births in something called a soul contract. The exit points coincide with what we’re here to learn and do (earth school). From what I’ve learned, I don’t believe suicide is written into our soul contract; however, those who come into life to carry the weight of very heavy things have a much higher probability of committing suicide. I personally know multiple people who’ve attempted suicide but didn’t permanently exit their bodies because what they came to learn and do wasn’t finished. You hear this quite a bit in near-death experience stories, too. In short, if someone isn’t meant to exit at a specific point or via a suicide attempt, they won’t. The attempt will not result in loss of life.

If you know someone who deals with depression and anxiety, you know that it can become so incredibly overwhelming and dark that you’re unable to feel love for yourself, family or for life itself. And you’re overwhelmed with pain so deep that you just want to escape it any way you can. You’ve tried everything on the planet — therapy, pills, putting on a good face, hiding the pain — but nothing works. Many times, you think those you love will be better off without you.

WHAT A SOUL FEELS
A suicidal soul in a human body is in a state of unbearable despair. Pain, numbness, and sorrow make it impossible to feel love for self…for life.

A soul who committed suicide, and is now on the other side (heaven), CAN feel love again. They can look at their life, heal emotional wounds, and continue to love, protect, and guide those they left behind. There is no shaming, damnation, or hellfire. There’s only love and compassion on the other side.

Shouldn’t it be that way on this side, too?
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As a woman who has lost friends to suicide and a mom whose daughter battled suicidal ideation after multiple concussions, I know first-hand that losing those you love (and/or the fear of potential loss) sends us into a tailspin of despair and grief. But shaming and blaming those who end their lives does not lessen the pain we feel. Having compassion and empathy for their journey—and their exit—does.

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​Little Voices is the true story of an ordinary woman’s unexpected psychic mediumship journey that uncovered buried secrets of sexual abuse in her own life and the lives of children who died long ago—and helped her escape the grasp of a seductive predator who nearly destroyed her.  (Post Hill Press/Simon & Schuster/Blackstone Publishing (Audiobook)