KIERSTEN HATHCOCK
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​Blog Posts

What I've Learned About Suicide as a Psychic Medium

12/28/2022

17 Comments

 
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When someone takes their own life, society asks questions.
​
  • Why didn’t they reach out to someone?
  • How could they leave their family behind?
  • They didn’t seem depressed…how could they do that?
  • They had it all…why did they do that??​

Many folks even declare that to end a life is selfish.

As an intuitive medium who communicates with souls who have passed on — including souls who’ve committed suicide — I want to share what I’ve come to learn about suicide from a spiritual perspective.

My hope is that by sharing what I’ve experienced and learned over the years, you’ll find a bit of comfort in knowing your loved ones and friends who took their own lives are still loving you from the other side.

THERE IS NO HELL
I’ve learned that taking your own life isn’t a sin and there is no “hell” in a fire and brimstone way. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. When you pass on, you are greeted by loved ones and guides who help you adjust to being in spirit/soul form sans a human body. From what I’ve experienced, this is true for all of us, no matter how we pass.

Sometimes confusion and fear set in (on a soul level) after one takes their own life. Like in the case of Matt, a teen who committed suicide and came to me in spirit for help, he just needed to be reassured that he wasn’t going to hell if he crossed into the light. His religion told him he’d burn in hell. I told him what I knew about the light: that once he entered it, he could come back and forth on a spirit level. That he was not crossing over into a fiery eternity. Thank goodness he believed me and moved easily into the arms of his loved ones on the other side. (NOTE: I share more about my time with Matt, and how he found me, in my memoir, LITTLE VOICES (Post Hill Press/Simon and Schuster).

From what I’ve learned as a medium, Earth is quite literally “earth school” — a place we come to learn and grow, and most importantly, love. We’re here as souls in human form to learn to love ourselves and others. It sounds simple, right?! But look at the way we judge and treat others. We’re masters at raising people up and tearing them down. And then dictating how everyone should live. The business of being human is messy, wonderful, heartbreaking, complicated, and believe it or not, purposeful. We even sign up for more of it lifetime after lifetime. It’s hard to comprehend with our rational human minds, but on a soul level, it makes perfect sense. After all, we’re souls having a human experience, not the other way around.

LIFE EXIT POINTS
From my experience talking with loved ones on the other side, we pre-plan possible life exits before our births in something called a soul contract. The exit points coincide with what we’re here to learn and do (earth school). From what I’ve learned, I don’t believe suicide is written into our soul contract; however, those who come into life to carry the weight of very heavy things have a much higher probability of committing suicide. I personally know multiple people who’ve attempted suicide but didn’t permanently exit their bodies because what they came to learn and do wasn’t finished. You hear this quite a bit in near-death experience stories, too. In short, if someone isn’t meant to exit at a specific point or via a suicide attempt, they won’t. The attempt will not result in loss of life.

If you know someone who deals with depression and anxiety, you know that it can become so incredibly overwhelming and dark that you’re unable to feel love for yourself, family or for life itself. And you’re overwhelmed with pain so deep that you just want to escape it any way you can. You’ve tried everything on the planet — therapy, pills, putting on a good face, hiding the pain — but nothing works. Many times, you think those you love will be better off without you.

WHAT A SOUL FEELS
A suicidal soul in a human body is in a state of unbearable despair. Pain, numbness, and sorrow make it impossible to feel love for self…for life.

A soul who committed suicide, and is now on the other side (heaven), CAN feel love again. They can look at their life, heal emotional wounds, and continue to love, protect, and guide those they left behind. There is no shaming, damnation, or hellfire. There’s only love and compassion on the other side.

Shouldn’t it be that way on this side, too?
​

As a woman who has lost friends to suicide and a mom whose daughter battled suicidal ideation after multiple concussions, I know first-hand that losing those you love (and/or the fear of potential loss) sends us into a tailspin of despair and grief. But shaming and blaming those who end their lives does not lessen the pain we feel. Having compassion and empathy for their journey—and their exit—does.

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​Little Voices is the true story of an ordinary woman’s unexpected psychic mediumship journey that uncovered buried secrets of sexual abuse in her own life and the lives of children who died long ago—and helped her escape the grasp of a seductive predator who nearly destroyed her.  (Post Hill Press/Simon & Schuster/Blackstone Publishing (Audiobook)
17 Comments
Lynda Lee
3/8/2023 04:03:22 pm

My mother committed suicide when I was four and a half years old. Well let me put it this way that's what the police report said. But throughout my life paying close attention to family mainly my father, I've come to realize that there's a good possibility that she did not in fact do that.
Regardless of whether she did or didn't she's gone. For 54 years now I lived in torment over whether she did or didn't over whether it was my fault or not, oh whether my father did it, the list goes on.
I don't understand why I'm constantly ignored by psychic mediums on tiktok when I say I need answers from my mother. Why do they avoid me. Why won't anybody help me to speak with my mother and learn the truth. I'm about ready to try and take things into my own hands and communicate with the other side.
Also, as you say suicidal spirits are not in hell you're right about that. Nobody is in Hell yet because hell doesn't exist until the day of the Lord comes back. Those of us are on the planet and those of us as souls are all awaiting his arrival and his judgment as to where we go next. But I don't believe that someone who convinced suicide is automatically gained for hell. I believe that if we ask for forgiveness and understanding that we just can't handle this life here on this planet and we don't belong here did Jesus will have that loving heart and forgiveness to save us from the flame

Reply
Kiersten
3/8/2023 04:23:35 pm

Dear Linda,

I'm so sorry you've endured so much pain, and from such an early age. My heart goes out to you. Sadly, there are many cases that ring similar to your mom's case. :(

As for communicating with the other side, we all have the ability, we just have to develop it. I think that's a great idea, if you decide not to work with a paid professional medium. I share many resources for strengthening your intuitive skills on my RESOURCES section of my website. Under that same header, you'll find a section for Trusted Specialists, if you decide to look into contracting services with a professional medium. I can vouch for all of the mediums on that page.

I wish you all the best and hope you find answers and peace.

Reply
Morgan
4/19/2023 07:08:00 am

I hope that reincarnation isn’t a mandatory path at some point during spiritual existence. I can’t think of any fate more cruel than having to 1. Do this life thing a second time and 2. Be separated from my current family on both a mortal AND ethereal level for eternity when being forced to start over on this cruel blue marble. Knowing that I can exist again with no memory of them is a Hellish thought. If loving others is s a gift worth striving and being thankful for, than what pain could be greater than knowing your entire conscious life that at some point those close to you are gradually going to be picked off by old age, disease, accidents or violence? Is this not a cruel punishment? By my own definition that is Hell.

Reply
J
7/7/2023 04:01:27 am

No one is "forced" to do anything. All these "rules" are being channeled from lower places. Earth has bureaucracy. Not love. Love doesn't keep score, nor does it penalize you for being human. Beware these kinds of websites. They spread the New Age lies, all channeled from rampant thought forms created through collective egregores and spread like a virus. Although even NDEs are subjective, there are some observations that are universal, which completely invalidate a lot of these "rules" propagated by religions and New Age. I recommend you hone your skills and find out for yourself. Just remember that whatever restrictive beliefs you choose, you will also bind yourself to. You will create them as your reality. Break the shackles. You are sovereign. You are no one's slave. You make the rules. You don't "have" to do anything.

Reply
Nicole
7/16/2023 12:27:05 pm

I agree! Being forced to started over and with no memory or spiritual connection to your loved ones does seem like a cruel punishment.

Reply
Wesley
5/4/2023 01:04:35 pm

My girlfriend commited suicide last month, I lived the whole experience worst time of my life, she left behind 4 daughters which 3 were in my care, I just try to understand but I can’t and it gives me anxiety sometimes to think why why and why not look for help etc try doing things the correct way

Reply
J
7/7/2023 03:52:16 am

"Help" is very limited. If you had to ask such a tone deaf, flippant question then you have no idea what it means to be so far into the darkness that you've lost the very desire to even bother looking for the light. At that point, the person is now concerned they are no longer worthy of it, nor help, nor the people in their lives. They are beyond earthly help and in need of something more advanced and invasive. -an review restructuring of the soul, in the most severe cases.

Reply
David Cotterell
6/28/2023 06:38:45 am

I lost my brother last year to suicide. In my heart of hearts it felt like the second time I lost him, since we both endured sociopathic levels of abuse at our mother's hands. Then he and I became irreconcilably estranged when we were still kids.

Thank you so much for writing and sharing this article. This gave me a lot of hope that his soul can yet find peace, if it hasn't already. In the end that is all I truly wanted for him to be able to have.

Reply
Thevindee Bandara
7/8/2023 02:46:24 am

I'm suicidal. I had a rough an unpleasant childhood with toxic family and SA. I've been diagnosed with depression and BPD. For years I took medication and therapy but the pain is getting worse to the point its unbearable. My family just abandoned me when I need them the most. I'm in pain. Please tell me will I go to hell? I'm hurt...I can't. Please. Will the spiritual world accept me with love? I don't want to be reincarnated.

Reply
Jennifer Carter
8/29/2023 09:53:12 am

Please do not hurt yourself. Just call the 988 number and talk it out. I've recently experienced suicide in our family and the pain your decision will cause is huge. I know it's your choice and if that's what you want than so be it, however please know that no matter what you feel in this moment - it will intensify by 1000% for those you leave behind. Even if your inner voice say's I'm full of shit, I have no idea - you know what's best etc - please understand that the pain you have will transfer and cause grief that will last forever to those friends and family members that love you.

Reply
Sean
8/16/2023 09:54:47 am

My Mom committed suicide when I was 10. 10 months after my dad passed when I was 9. Not a day passes where I don't want to kill myself, I suffer from depression it's intense and it never rests. I just want it to end. I don't want to go to hell, I want to be at peace, I'm ready.

Reply
Jennifer Carter
8/29/2023 09:59:10 am

Please hold on and call 988. Talk to someone about this feeling. If only to say it out loud - it will no longer cause you the same pain. It might help, it might not. Just know that if you talk with no one about this feeling then you might leave your loved ones with an unbearable pain. I've lost someone on 8/1/23 and their death is causing a ripple effect of horror to so many that loved this person. The inner voice that you hear telling you to end it all is not you. It's your despair. Please know that ending it without at least letting someone know the truth of what is happening or why - it rips people apart in a manner you can not comprehend in your moments of despair. Do not continue to suffer in silence. Please reach out.

Reply
Aaron
9/20/2023 04:48:16 am

The pain of those I leave behind will not compare to what I endure constantly. It's just a way to transform , to lose the pain. If that means oblivion and the end of any conscious freedom then that's okay with me. It's not sad, it's just a way to escape.

Reply
Jennifer Carter
9/20/2023 04:43:00 pm

Aaron that belief could very well be 100% true but after you’ve made your decision it will be too late to even gloat that you were right. I’m sorry for the unbearable pain and suffering you are experiencing. There’s nothing worse in these moments. Hopefully you are reading this right now. Hopefully you will try alternative methods in escaping this often hard and cold reality that don’t involve such a great gamble. After all, oblivion and conscious freedom can be found here on earth if you seek them out. The use of our imagination could fill library shelves on the endless ways in which to obtain them. Keep alive because you matter Aaron and because you are a son/brother/uncle/cousin/father/husband/grandfather/friend/co-worker/acquaintance to someone and sad won’t be the word they use. Sounds harsh but suicide loss grief is complex and one that I wouldn’t want to wish upon anyone. You should find - if you can - a safe space in which you express freely and without judgement why life is like this for you. I wish my loved one had. Not trying to invoke guilt on you just giving you context. I hope you’re able to find comfort in whatever way is possible for you today and going forward.

Reply
Kiersten
9/20/2023 05:16:24 pm

Hi Jennifer,

I'm so sorry for your loss. It's such unimaginable pain to lose someone so suddenly. I can feel how much you're grieving (in your writing) and my heart breaks for you.

I also want to say that I appreciate your messages of love and hope but I am concerned that, despite your beautiful intention to help those who have posted and are hurting, they might not be perceived in a helpful, positive way. (Also, many folks comment and then write to me privately. In case you felt you needed to respond to each comment.)

My intention in writing this post was to share what I experience as someone who connects with those on the other side and to offer a space for those who are hurting to freely comment or reach out to me. There's so much shame around the subject, and while I don't want a soul to leave this planet, I also have come to understand how complex it all is.

Sending lots of love to you. While I know the pain never goes away, we just adjust to living with it, I hope you find moments of lightness in your pain.

Kiersten

Reply
Jennifer Carter
9/21/2023 05:29:46 am

Thank you for the kind words. I’m not trying to step on your toes or hinder someone else who is in pain. I did stumble upon this blog in the quest of trying to understand this complex issue of suicide loss. I hope you truly mean that you’re offering a safe space for people to comment. If the thousands of souls hurting actually felt safe and spoke out about the suicidal ideations maybe more would choose to live. I won’t comment anymore. I hope the many that do reach out to you privately can afford the cost of your services or professional help. It shouldn’t be stigmatized and shouldn’t be private but that’s my unprofessional opinion while dealing with suicide loss grief.

Kiersten
9/21/2023 07:20:24 am

Thank you. ❤️ I just wanted to clarify that I volunteer my time as a medium and a sounding board. Professionally, I’m the CEO and founder of a furniture brand and the co-founder of a nonprofit organization that helps crime victims and their families (NILJ.org). In short, I’m not a paid medium but I work with law enforcement to help solve missing and murdered persons cases. Most of whom I channel are children who have passed unexpectedly. My memoir Little Voices (and this website) tell my story. All my best to you.




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  • Home
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